Quartermax Tragedy

Yesterday was the Who Tri's Harder? race. I woke up and was excited because at the time I knew it would be a great day. I was awake, ready to race and counting the hours until the start. I got to the race site around 6am and set up my transition area. Afterwards, I met up with my parents and began the pre race routine that happens with my parents around, which primarily entails telling my dad to be quiet as he continually tells me to keep my head up in the water. With a hour to go before the race, I went for a warm up swim and felt great the whole way through the water. I then met up with two clients who decided to come see what I do. The next hour went by quickly as I went off by myself to prepare mentally for the race.Running late, our swim wave was gathered on the beach minutes away from starting the race, when it happened. Standing approx. 25 yards from the finish, I hear a frantic screaming that is different than the normal yelling of praise to athletes exiting. Immediately myself and 10 other athletes race over and as we near I hear the words I never thought I would hear. "He's under, He went down right there! Find him!" What happened next was nothing short of controlled insanity. We were joined with 100 other athletes and, if as we had done it thousand times before, we formed a search line and in 7 feet of water we found him. As I popped up for air I was face to face with the guy we were searching for. Instantly we dragged the man ashore and while others were making room, myself and another athlete began CPR. It was only about 30 - 45 secs before the paramedics arrived and relieved us of our duties. 30 - 45 minutes passed by as we waited for news and watched as they airlifted him out. We were informed that although the swim would be shortened, we would continue on in the spirit of the sport. Emotionally and physically spent, I decided that although I was in no shape or form the race, that I would push on and do my best to race anyway. Needless to say, the swim was horrible with thoughts of what just happened fresh in mind. As I exited the swim I felt overwhelmed with how many people stuck around to cheer us on. The bike also started out horrible as my chain fell off and I couldnt get my foot into the left shoe until 5 miles into the course. After that point, I was able to get into a rhythm with only one exception, where I passed a guy that was by my side in the rescue and looking in each others eyes we just nodded and then I was hit with a wave of emotions that caused me to lose it for a minute. The run was the only portion that went of well, I ran strong and felt great to the finish.After the race, we were informed that the man that we had pulled out had passed away at noon. It was a sobering reality and a heavy cost that was paid that day. I feel pain and sorrow for not being able to do more, and my thoughts go out to his family, friends and also to the race director, staff and fellow athletes that were affected by this tragedy. I must also say that I am proud to be part of a community that, when trouble arises, drops it all to rush to aid.

A new chapter in Dish vs Bone

Well as some may know, this weekend was the St. Peters Rec plex Triathlon. This was also the first race in a year that I got to compete against a fellow athlete and friend who was equally matched with myself. We had raced and met back in 2005 but have not raced against each other since then, until this weekend. Michael "Dish" Dishman came in town on Sat before the race and we caught up while heading out on a hour tune up ride that evening. We then shared stories about the past year of racing and our plans for the year to come. We discussed future races we could race in, not only against each other but as a team, and agreed on some really crazy races.
After riding, we headed out to our favorite pre race carb up resteraunt, Fazoli's. You may be saying "WHAT!?!" but every time that Dish or I have eaten there we have had a wonderful race, so why mess with what works. (side note: If you are affiliated with Fazolis - we are looking for sponsorship.) The rest of the night was filled with catching up and alot of shaving on my side.
4 am Race Day - Wake up, eat oatmeal, drink water, stretch. That was the routine. Checked the bag, made note that had to get Vasoline for the shoes and coffee.
5am - Got the Vasoline and coffee and on way to race. At 5:30 we pull in and the energy starts to rise. Nervous energy surges for a few minutes as I sit in the car and run through the race in my head. A good feeling and I am ready to go.
630am - Have been chatting it up with a bunch of fellow athletes. Race starts. I still have 1:21:30 to wait. AHHHHH! Pass the time by stretching and fiddling with the bike.
7:20am - In the pool area, nervous energy starting to rise. I do some arm circles, stretch and cheer on Dish as he swims past. Now I am in line and sizing up the people around me. Talk to a guy who is here for his first time. Give a few tips and tell him not to worry. Nervous Energy has now settled to excitement and all pistons are hitting on all cylinders. The last 2 minutes before my start take forever and are a blur as I was in auto pilot (good sign).
Swim is over and I don't remember half of it, I do remember my watch coming off in the 4th lap so no more knowing my time. Make my way to the bike and make a clean mount. 15 Minutes later and I am already nearing the turnaround, I have to check the excitement I don't want to burn to much energy. I hit the service road hill (1.5 Mile to go) and my computer say 50 minutes. New Record here I come. I miss judge the dismount which causes me a minute, but I am still off the bike in 57 Minutes a new best for the course.
Hitting the run, it takes an extra half mile for my legs to get under me. Now I am cruising and cheering everybody else on. I am sure some thought I was crazy to cheer them on when I am clearly trying to run fast, but thats what I love about the sport. As I near the finish line, I am unsure as to when to start my sprint since they altered the run course. I see a Volunteer and as I gesture where it is, he points and, reading my mind, yells encouragment. Now knowing my goal I make a dead sprint to the finish and cross in 1:44:35. Excitement and curiosity rage, did I beat Dish? Where did I place?
The awards ceremony reveals that while I made a great race and finished 7th in my Age Group and 37th out of close to 500. Dish beat me with a 1:38:13 and a 3rd in AG and 15th overall. A good job for Dish and fuel for my next race.
We are still unsure of our next race but be gauranteed it will be a good one. We are leaning to competing as a team in a 2008 race, the race? A 24-Hour Triathlon in Colorado. It will be a blast!

A little Rant

It is such a great feeling to wake up the day after a long ride and to be completely refreshed. It's a dangerous thing too. All I want to do is go right back out there, get my bike dirty, have my legs ache, go to bed early and do it again tomorrow. However, I have to fight the urge and let those legs take the day off. Maybe I will go run. Maybe I will go swim. Both sound really good. Hmmm, whatever I do, I know I will have to hold myself back because I know I will go way to hard if I don't.
Anyway, thats not the main reason for this blog. The real reason is that I have been getting the same questions I got last year. Why do you do this? Don't you have a life? What do you do for fun? - These questions drive me NUTS!!! It implies that I a) don't have a life and b) do not enjoy doing these things. Sometimes I wish I could slap these people for insulting me in such a way. My question to them, that I wish I would ask more often, is what productive thing are you doing with your life? After all, and I may be a little biased here, I feel that those of us who compete in endurance sports are doing some of the most beneficial and healthy things we could do. We typically eat very well, exercise a lot and push ourselves to new boundaries, emotionally and physically.
Do I wish I could spend more time with my friends, absolutely unless of course all we are doing is sitting around. Then I would rather that they come out and do something active and rewarding with me.
Do I wish I had a relationship with a girl, again absolutely. However, it is hard to find someone who can keep up with my lifestyle and can understand the drive inside me. No way will I try to make a relationship with a girl who's main goal is to go out party and drink. I want someone who can enjoy life like it was meant to be, active. So until she shows up, I will be single, anyway its more time to train:)
And to answer why I do this, well unless you have experienced what it is like to go up to the wall of your limits and knock it down, then there is no way you could understand. All of you who have, know and need no explanation. There is no greater thing than to beat your own limits and discover that there is no limit unbreakable.

Ok, well I am done ranting for now. I will leave you all with a Happy Memorial Day and a farewell til next post. I think I will go swim by the way.

I love the Wind

As I headed out for my 90 minute recovery ride yesterday, I never thought about how windy it was and how it would affect me on the road. In fact, I didn't even notice that the wind was blowing fairly steady at a brisk 20-25 mph until I got 10 minutes into my ride. That all changed, however, when I got to my first downhill and the wind decided that instead of being on the shoulder of the road, I belonged in the right lane as it slid me 5 feet into traffic. Thank God there weren't many cars out. None the less, I was going to get my 90 minutes in, even if I was only doing 13mph. Fast Forward 30 minutes and I am coming off a big hill, getting ready to hit the flats and then I heard it. That beautiful sound your bike makes when its cruising along in excess of 20+ mph. So, not feeling like I was pushing hard, I was curious to how fast I was going and thats when I saw 31.3mph reading back and I was hardly trying! I love you wind. Fast Forward another 30 minutes, after I decided that I wanted to "Time Trial" again, and I am moving at a break neck speed of 12mph into the wind. Looking at my legs you would imagine I was going 60 yet all I could manage was 12 max. Then after 10 minutes of almost standing still, I hit the stop sign I was aiming for and turned around. That 10 min trip then only took 1 1/2 minutes to return as I topped out at 36.5 mph. Ohh how I loved the tail wind. All in all, I had a great time, enjoying stiff head wind and fast tailwinds that left me wishing I could have found a 20 mile flat with the wind to my back :)

Glad to be here

Well as some may already know, the race didn't go completely as planned. The short version is that I posted my first DNF(Did Not Finish) yesterday after basically collapsing on the run course.

The detailed version goes like this. I had a wonderful race, It was the first time that I felt comfortable in the open water. Not once did I get disoriented or did I get that lactic acid build up that makes contemplate if I can make it. In fact, I swam a 45 min 1.2 mile and I honestly felt like I was only out there for 15 minutes. Granted there were moments that snapped me out of the "zone" like at the first turn where the volunteer accidentally whacked me in the head with his surf board or near the finish when I ran head on into a guy who, being so disoriented, swam perpendicular to the entire course. But thats what open water swimming includes and I was glad that I beat my planned time and did so with minimal effort.
As for the bike, well even though that is where the fatal flaw that killed my race day occurred, it to was a good time. For the first 25 miles I was able to talk it up with a fellow competitor who was holding my same pace. It was a great way to pass 25 miles and I am glad for that. The flaw happened when I was able to stay in the "zone" and actually push through 15-20 mph headwinds for the 30 mile stretch and not lose speed. Looking back I probably didn't eat enough on the bike to match the exertion, but hey that is what the first time is about - to learn some lessons. Anyhow, I still feel I was within my limits when I came off the bike, unfortunately a stronger headwind and a weaker nutrition did me in.
Coming off the bike, you could tell I was hurting, but I pushed on. I found myself walking, which I have never done before, and would try to pick it back up to a run. I would go 1/4 mile and then the legs would lock up and I would have to walk. It wasn't until the 3 mile marker when I literally ran into a medic on a bike that I finally realized that I was done. I decided that it was better to drop out, lick my wounds and actually be able to race again in a month than to push on and do God knows what to my body - since it was already shutting down.

To sum it all up, of course I am a little upset I didn't finish, but I am happier that I at a place where I know I can overcome the rat race mentality and do what is best for my body and not my ego. I am glad that I was able to enjoy a wonderful vacation with my friends and glad to have learned some lessons out on the course. Anyway, there is always Half-Max and other Half's around here. (right Dishman).

Excited

So I am sitting here at work and I can't stop thinking about this weekend. I am so excited! In 5 days I will be competing in my first ever Half-Ironman ( a year ahead of schedule) and as per my last blog, I am a lot readier than I thought. This weekend once again helped me realize that, as I ran 5 miles in 35 min on Sat and 7 miles in 46 min on Sunday. The great thing about that was that when I finished my run on Sunday, my legs didn't even feel like I had ran. I felt great the whole run and even had a great time visualizing myself in the race. So with just over 2 days until I leave, I am restless and excited and can't wait to get down there. Wish me luck!

P.S. If you are up early on Sunday you can watch my progress online at www.ironman.com and there will be a link to track athletes. If you use my race number (2144) you should be able to see the progress.

More Ready than I realized

OK, so if you have been around me over the past few weeks you most likely have heard me mention(and probably more than once) that did not feel at all ready for my upcoming Half-Ironman in 2 weeks. And while I may not have trained to the extent that I wanted or as frequently as I wanted, today I realized that I am further along than I thought. You see I woke up this morning and decided that I had to do something about this self doubt, so I did what only seemed natural, I decided to run for 13 miles and see how long it would take. Well, as the title says it, I am more ready to race than I realize. I may not be ready to win it, but I am ready to race. At first I didn't think I was doing that well when I came to the 11 mile mark, that is until I passed a couple that I had already lapped once and they gave me that "didn't we just see him" look which made me look at watch to see just how slow I was going. Thats when I realized I wasn't going slow, instead I was setting a new Personal Record. I finished the 13 Mile run with a little bit of heaviness in my legs and my watch reading 1:28:28. Thats right, I set out for a 8 min/mile pace and inadvertently ran a 6:40 pace and still felt strong at the end.

While there were a couple of times that I was questioning my motive for the spontaneous long run, in the end I realized it was exactly what I needed to snap out of my doubting.

So I say with complete confidence that "I am ready to race, and I can't wait to get out there and push the limit"

What a Feeling

As I lay here in bed preparing to fall asleep I am reminded about one of the reasons I love training for Triathlons. My arms are sore, my back is sore, I am physically wasted and yet I know tomorrow I will wake up refreshed, only slightly sore and ready to hit the pavement. It wasn't always that way, it used to be that I dreaded getting up in the early morning and would try to find every excuse possible to get out of the training. Now, however, I may have one day like that a week, but more times than not I am up before the alarm goes off and looking forward to put in a good workout.

Anyway, that is what is on my mind and maybe later I will repost more but for now that is all and now it is time to go to bed. So Good Night.

Tying it together

Two Questions and one statement in different context but similar in meaning. Are YOU famous? Are YOU a Professional? And "YOU drop him!". How is it that two separate and definitely unique situations could come to hit me in a profound and motivating way? Last September, in the last 600 yards or so of my race a complete stranger leaned into the road from the course, observing the 200 yard gap between myself and the guy ahead of me, and boldly stated " You drop him!". Fast Forward to tonight and a girl that I had only known for 5 minutes, during our conversation about the appearance of the the Real World/Road Rules cast at the place we were at, turns to me and asks " Are YOU famous, Are YOU a Professional?". Little did I know that a few minutes later that those questions would seep past the Bull Shit Talk Filters and inadvertently push a button that has been needing to be pushed.

Every race season I struggle to get myself motivated in order to get in the proper training needed to compete effectively in Triathlons. This year, with the my first Half-Ironman and my first appearance in the USAT Age Group Nationals, there is no lack of motivation. However, there is still the issue of my future in the sport and the my shady, at best, sense of direction as to what I planned to do in the years to come. Unknowingly to me, this issue would not only be brought to the surface but also be addressed with the help of two questions.

Somewhere between introducing my new friends to a couple of the members of the Real World/Road Rules cast and dancing a light flickered on in my head. Triggered by the questions posed earlier, I began to ask myself why I am NOT famous or why I am NOT a professional, when it hit me. I needed a concrete goal. I needed a plan that would focus on driving above the rest in the field to be known. So where to start? This year I will compete in the races I have planned and a few more local ones and, using the results of the Half-Ironman and Age Group Nationals, I will determine which distance is my stronger fit. Once I have decided which distance to pursue I will put all effort and energy into the training for that distance so that in 3 years time I will be able to be regarded as top of my field or at least know that I had given it my all. Even though tomorrow I may physically regret going out last night, mentally it was one of the greatest nights. I have been able to answer some hidden questions that have lingered and in doing such have been able to light a fire that will propel me through some tough times ahead. I hope those close to me are ready and I can't wait t get some renewed inspiration from the doubters and haters.

To wrap it up, I must thank Cassie because she unknowingly pushed a button that has re-ignited the passion for the sport and the pursuit of higher, loftier goals.

Defining Questions

Why am I a trainer? How will I earn today? What can I do to exceed other's expectations of me? Over the past few days, I have begun to realize how important these questions are for me to answer and live out every day. But why?

Since leaving 24 Hour Fitness and stepping up to the next level in my career, purpose and meaning behind what I do and say has become clearer by the day. Coming out from under the "corporate" umbrella is freeing, but with that freedom comes more responsibility to represent the values and ethics that got me to this place in the first place. Somewhere down the line I forgot the answers to these questions and how they had molded me into the level of trainer that I was. Recently, thanks to some new and great influences in my life, I was reminded about their importance and how a few small changes in attitudes could not only put me back to that level, but take me above and beyond.

The answers to the questions aren't always going to be the same but the methods and answers may be similar and I will share the most common answers.

Why am I a Trainer?
It is a passion of mine to help people establish healthier and active lifestyles. After losing all my weight and experiencing the 180 degree turn around myself, I find it natural to want to share my blessing with others.

How will I earn today?
It may sound corny but everyday is a gift that should be earned. With that in mind, I will try to enjoy the day and find at least one positive takeaway.

What can I do to exceed other's expectations of me?
When I just meet others expectations, I always feel as if there were more things that I could do. To exceed expectations, I will keep my focus on the clients. I will be there for my friends and family. I will take that extra second to make sure things are put up at work or that my workplace is clean and orderly for the next person.

As I said, these questions will be answered differently day to day but the main focus will be along the lines of what was stated above. I am glad that I have been able to be reminded of the importance of these questions and how living out the answers to these questions can make for some simple yet profound changes in not only mine but other peoples lives.

Now I ask you, What are the questions that define you?

Forecast calls for rain

"When it rains, it pours."

Today is one of those days that seems to resonate with that quote. I woke up feeling like I had a 25lb plate on my chest. After fighting off this sickness for over a week now, it finally got the best of me some time last night. With this illness going around the way it has, I have decided that I would take the next 2 days off to get better and hope that I could get it beat sooner than let it knock me down for a week or so.

As well, about an hour after I called my boss to tell him I was sick, I had to call him back to tell him that I will miss more days this week due to the loss of my Uncle Tommy. He had been losing his health over the past few months but it is still a shock. I had not been as close to him as I used to but I still feel a new emptiness in my life. I feel at a loss as to what to say to my mom, who has just lost her brother.

As I lay here on the couch and think about the day so far, I just wonder what else is in store. I hope for a smooth week. I pray that my family and especially my mom will find comfort through these times. I also hope that I will be able to bring her comfort in whatever way possible.

Finding a Groove

Well, I have been working at my new job for just over 3 weeks and all things considered, I love it. I love the clients, the atmosphere and the people that I work with and I can truthfully say that the risk I took coming over from 24 was well worth it. Yet there is still that uneasy feeling, but why and what it is, I can not explain. There are times when I will be doing stuff and I feel like everybody is questioning it is what I do. There are other times when I feel like although accepted, I am not fitting in. Whatever it is, I am trying to figure it out.

If it is that I am, in fact, not fitting in then I hope that I will be able to figure out a way to make it work out. If it is anything else then, again, I hope that I will be able to work it out. I am sure that is nothing at all but to me it is an issue that I need to take care of because of how much I value this new position and the future it holds for me.

In fact as I think about it and type it out here I am sure it is the same feelings anybody would feel when leaving a job that was 'comfortable' to pursue a more rewarding/challenging job. I think it is the uncomfortable feelings that one gets when trying to find a new groove in a new environment. On top of it, with the amount of hours that I put in, I have lost my connection with people that I would normally be able to vent these feelings to,or at least feel that I have lost the connections. As well, just as I had those people at my old job that I could talk with and share stuff with, I have yet to find who I could trust and open up with at the new place.

I also hope to ease some of these feelings by sitting down with one of the owners tomorrow and laying out some goals to shoot for, as it is something that is important when trying to reach new heights. So hopefully tomorrow will be a better day and each day thereafter will get a little better, but until then, thanks for reading my whining and heres to finding the proverbial groove.

What a Year

Ahhhhh What a Year so far...

Well it has been quite a while since my last blog, so here goes nothing.

First off, I am still sticking to my resolution and I must say it has been a very liberating and enjoyable experience. it sucks that it has to be that way, however, it is just as unfair to the friends that do give back in the friendship to have to put up with the lost energy that those people took. Enough said about that.

Well, most know but a few don't, but in the beginning of this year I was recruited to leave 24 and take a step up and train a few miles away at a personal training studio. It was a tough decision to leave the safety and familiarity of the job I was at, but the new one held so much promise that I couldn't find a reason not to go. That being said, I am so so so glad that i did because I absolutely love it, and the people I work with. Even though the adjustment period is a little tougher than I anticipated, it is still manageable.

Now to the meaty stuff.

Lately, for unknown reasons, I have been feeling very alone. I am sure that a lot can be due to the recent change in job, the increase in my training and etc. but none the less the feeling is still there. I know that once I get to really know some of the people that I work with and vice versa that I may find someone to vent to as I had at 24 but even then I can't place this feeling. A few things have happened that may have helped shed light on the feeling and it may very well be another 'growing point' for me. I first realized my feeling while on a trip to Cape over the past weekend. After taking care of a friend who needed care taking I got to experience a blessing in disguise. I got to experience a man that has been down the road I am on and am a wiser man thanks to him. The story is, I helped a friend get comfortable on the party bus to sleep off a good night of partying while the rest of our group stayed inside to watch the rest of the fights. After laying them down, I did what seemed only natural and chatted it up with the bus driver. Most of the conversation revolved around the fights, drunk idiots and those things, but one thing hit home for me. Out of nowhere, he asked me how well if I knew my friend and if she and I were dating, trying to figure out why I brought her out. After filling him in that, in fact, I had only known her for about a week, he came straight out and asked then why did I, and not someone who knew her better, bring her out. My answer, It's just what I do, I care for my friends; to which he replied that it was a very honorable selfless act and that if I kept it up, that I would get mine, then he looked me in the eyes and said "just not here". We chatted lightly after that but it honestly never sat in until tonight what he meant by that. I realized tonight that the good deeds people do almost always go unnoticed and while this revelation won't change much I hope it may bring one little change. The idea of how much a sincere "thank you" can mean to someone.

I will end this blog now, as it is getting pretty lengthy, but one final thought which has been swirling in my head now for a few hours.

I think God gave us two ears to remind us that while it is great to lend a friendly ear to someone else, sometimes we just need one for ourselves."